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Don't be alarmed, no one gets harmed | lukemitchwest's Blog


It's wednesday. Last saturday me and Georgie agreed to make it kinda official, like be boyfriend and girlfriend. In the interim, I have already fucked up.

Don't get me wrong, the last few days have been great. But I've had to reconsider a lot of things. 

I had a great two days doing student gigs. Students are my crowd and frankly I feel amazing after doing them, it goes so well. On the first night someone asked me to sign their chest afterwards! I drew a flower. On the second night I had my comedy improv course first, and Gabrielle was there. Gabrielle is blonde and she wears high heeled boots and woolen jumpers, and if she stretches sometimes the jumper lifts enough to see a tight, firm stomach. She gives the impression to me that she is a little bit mental. One time during an exercise we were meant to convey desire without words, and she took off the bauble holding her hair back and shook her head, unleashing a surprisingly ridiculously long cascade of hair. To me, it was crazy hot. And I do like mental. Anyway the gig goes really well- the promoter says some really lovely things and a big comic who I respect told me there might be a prospect of being paid support when he goes on tour. The comedy improv course people are all there too, as I invited them after class. the comedians, the course people and I all decide to go out afterwards. I am already really drunk off the free drinks at this point. Gabrielle and I get to chatting, where I find out that she IS mental, and also one of the funniest women I've ever met. I can't even remember why. I only remember some stuff, like she said she goes for months at a time without a phone and if people ask her how to get in touch with her she tells them "smoke signals" or "just find me!" [it's the way she told 'em, maybe]. I thought she was flirting with my mate ruaidhri so she was gonna get with him, but suddenly she kissed me. And then two other people start talking to me. They said they saw me perform earlier and asked me to sign stuff for them. They sort of get between me and gabrielle, but I want out anyway before anything more can happen. I try and edge out but they're coming with me. One of them is trying to hold my hand and saying that I'm going to come or something. I get into my taxi and they get in with me. They say they're going to take me home, and I don't realise they mean their home.
Typing this out this is starting to sound like an actual kidnap

I don't remember much else. I remember chatting to the one who told me she was going to make me come and doing a sexy dance on their living room table like a male stripper. I got into bed with her. I didn't want to have sex but I remember feeling I'd given her the impression that I did so it'd be shit of me to leave, so I pretend to fall asleep nearly immediately. She doesn't buy it. She tells me she won't have sex with me because she likes me and she'd like to see me again and asks me to tell her stories, so I do, if only to make sure that we don't have sex. She wants to spoon but I tell her I can't sleep in other peoples beds and make my excuses and leave and run out into the rain, but not before she kisses me too. I feel awful. I've cheated. I need to reconsider my position as a good person. It was a whirlwind that I wasn't really in control of but it still happened and it's a big deal for me. I thought I'd become a better person in these last few months. Even worse, that poor girl is expecting me to get in contact because she thinks I like her. uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuugh telling you didn't help this time, internet 

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